Au revoir...

is the hardest word in French...


Its been 5 days since we moved out of France, but we haven't stopped thinking about the land. When we came to France 5 years ago, in Aug 2004, we found ourselves struggling in every step. An alien culture, a foreign language, the bureaucracy, the 'system'...everything! Getting an internet connection to fixing up accounts for paying electricity and gas bills...everything was nightmarish. If you add to that the efficiency (or lack thereof) of the system, where inspite of every light on your modem blinking the way it should, you are still unable to access the net, frustration is bound to rise. And that's not all...you would now have to go down to the France Telecom office in rue grande, and explain the situation...in french! And if all you can manage is 'Je ne parle pas francais' (i don't speak french) and rattle off in English...God Bless You! For, like you, the only english the store salesman has learnt is 'I don't speak English'.


But that was 5 years ago...


Urvi was 1 1/2 years old when we came to Fontainebleau. She could barely speak Bengali, let alone any other language. We had moved as tenants to 41 Rue des pleus (an address, we'd often joke we would never get out of, during K's long and arduous PhD stint) to Lucette and Serge's 100 + year old home. I taught Urvi to call them 'Madame' and Monsieur' and greet them 'bonjour' whenever we met. She could only manage 'booboo' for bonjour, and I think she thought that to be Lucette's name. For very soon, she was saying things like ' I want to go to booboo's house'. Lucette of course did not mind. Both she and Serge have been like grandparents to Urvi, loving her, doting on her, anxious when she was sick, thrilled at her every accomplishment, always welcoming her with home-made cookies and tarte-aux-pommes, speaking to her slowly in French (and picking up some Bengali in return). In no time Urvi had become part of their family. She would be gone to their house for hours. Later I would hear that she had played in their garden, helped Lucette bake a cake, heard a story, ate lunch, learnt new words. They were also the first people we would turn to for help. In our five years in Fontainebleau, our landlords have been like family to us, and I could never express in words the gratitude I feel towards them.

Urvi with Lucette, Serge and Chloe, their grand-daughter

In time we made other friends; Linda, Carmen and Bianca, whose home we raided on days that rained, and on days that didn't, Emma, Samyukta and their moms Petra and Vidya, whom we knew for such a short while, yet had become incredibly close, my wonderful neighbors, Katie, Giovanna and Isabelle, Lou-Isa and Olga, Urvi's wonderful teachers Mme. Vaquer, Mrs Wakoutra and Mrs. Nalini Rangan, my Art of Living friends, Stephane, Bea, Alexia, Katrina, Serge, Anne and Chantal, the cats, Pifou and Simba. Nalini, who I met during an AOL course, was not only a teacher to Urvi but also a dear friend to me. Inspite of her busy schedule, she would always find time to invite me for lunch, and give me good solid advice when I needed it. Her home in India is in Bangalore, and she has made me promise that I'll visit soon, so we can go to the ashram together...and that's a promise I intend to keep.


Saying good-bye to all these wonderful people, who made us feel welcome in a foreign land, was almost as painful as leaving one's own family. We should know as we have done that too.


When the news of our moving to Singapore was confirmed, Urvi was excited about seeing a new place but kept asking when she was going to move back to France again. Not soon, we told her. Well then, can I come back for christmas? she asked. I guess when you are 6 years old, 5 years is a lifetime. This was 'home', the only 'home' she had come to know all her life.


This is not to say however that all the people we met in France were as warm and friendly. We have had our share of racial slurs and the infamous French arrogance, all too often. But in defense of the French, I'd like to say that pricks exist everywhere, in every corner of the world, even in that most perfect place of all, India! But these isolated incidents can no way take away the warmth and love we have experienced during our stay there.


In the end I feel these years were significant for us in many ways. K decided to quit corporate life for good and join academics, a step that required a tremendous amount of courage and dedication, Urvi started formal schooling, learnt an enormous amount of things, the most important being friendship, I started writing again, but most importantly, found what I had been looking for all my life, The Art of Living. This was a time we all grew in some way, both individually and together as a family.


For all that, France and especially Fontainebleau, will always be in our hearts.


It was 3 a.m when I started writing this post. I dreamt that we were again in our Fontainebleau home, Urvi playing in Lucette's beautiful garden. I couldn't go back to sleep...


I guess we were right... we would never really get out of 41, rue des pleus...